Wednesday December 16th, 2020
You may be wondering, how come no one else has been in this story besides Ryan, Chelsie, Maisie, and the hospital staff? Well, stupid covid, that’s why. But it was beyond important to me that our family got the chance to meet Maisie. Especially Isla and Lachlan. I felt they needed to see baby to grasp fully the end of the story, and it wouldn’t have done them any favors for this all to just disappear as if nothing happened. Well, no one was allowed to come to the hospital. So we asked the funeral home if they would permit us to come the next day with our family so they could meet and hold Maisie – and the funeral home graciously agreed. Todd, Christine, Robbie, Maddie, Leslie, and Carine were able to join us at the funeral home in Norwood Young America. We all arrived around 10am and gathered in the front parlor. First, Ryan and I took our kids in to see Maisie lying in her cozy box, which could have looked like a little bassinet. Next we let the rest of the family come in to see. After everyone got his or her first look, I got Maisie out to hold. She was still bundled and cuddled in her comfy gown and cozy blankets and little hat. I went and sat down with her and showed everyone her big feet, her hands, etc. As time had continued to pass, Maisie’s appearance continued to decline. We chose to not do any sort of embalming. We wanted to keep her pure. But they did close her mouth, which was sad because now we couldn’t see her precious lips, and her chin was really tucked in. I lamented this was how our family had to meet her. When it was even that much harder to see past death’s deterioration. At this point, Isla was feeling sad & uncomfortable so she became withdrawn and only wanted dada to hold her. I showed Lachlan baby Maisie and he was so interested. He said her name so clearly and looked at her with no fear or confusion. Since Isla wasn’t in a state and get pictures… we handed Maisie off to family so they could each get their turn to say hello and goodbye. Finally we were able to convince Isla to sit down with us so we could get some family pictures. Isla and Lachlan looked lovingly upon their little sister. Lachlan kept wanting to “boop!” her nose! Isla held her head and gave her nose a “boop” too. Lachlan even wanted to hold the baby! So we let him hold her very carefully with a lot of guidance and structure. And overall I was presently surprised with how the children had no fear in this situation. Granted, Lachlan didn’t fully comprehend. But Isla did. And they were seeing death up close and personal at the ages of 4 and (nearly) 2. It was precious to have these few moments together as a family – a family of 5, a family that should have gone home together and continued to grow. Aftewards, Ryan and Chelsie stayed to plan all the logistics of the funeral with Mackenzie. Thankfully Carine offered to take our kids back to her house because they started to get really restless and it would have been hard to focus on the upcoming decisions with our kids running around or whining to be held or played with or fed. So Ryan and I stayed and planned a funeral for our child. Once that was complete, we headed towards Chaska to pick up our kids. We made a quick stop at Target on the way to pick up a picture frame to put up at the funeral. I chose to ride on one of the motorized wheelchairs at Target since walking long distances still made me pretty sore. Target was my first moment being out in public. It was odd being among people going about their daily lives, when all I wanted to do was scream to everyone, “My baby just died!!” We continued on our way, stopped by Carine’s, chatted a little big, then grabbed our kids and went home. Another day gone, God’s peace carried us through, we checked more to-do’s off the list, as we now inched our way to the funeral on Saturday. #maisiemarthaofsthun Published 1/16/2021
1 Comment
Ashley
1/16/2021 08:59:24 pm
So proud of those littles. They get their strength from their mama 💖
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AuthorMother. Jesus Lover. Mourner of my stillborn Maisie Martha Ofsthun. Archives
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